Thursday, March 31, 2016

Out of the fog.

I've been in a fog the past few weeks, struggling with the black dog of depression. Just going through the motions with a pasted on smile; as my father is fond of saying "fake it 'til you make it. Going to Minneapolis was a bit of a trigger for me, it seems. I knew there would be some emotional fall-out from the trip, but I didn't expect a funk that would last four weeks.
But Tuesday I awoke with my head in a positive place and the storm clouds had cleared. Some favourable wind blew in and brought me back to the me I've worked hard to become.

In addition to not feeling well, I also wasn't eating well. Or sleeping well. Or writing. It was just too hard. I started to, many times, but just gave up and made excuses to myself. My brain just felt too muddled to make sense of the stream of thoughts swirling beneath the surface. Today is clear and bright and I am ready. It's going to be a great day

Friday, March 11, 2016

A Day of Beauty

What a nice day! I've been in a very positive mindset all day. Maybe because today was the first true 'warm' day on the Prairies in many months. And what happens here when spring finally peeks it's sunny head around a snowbank? Everyone heads outside to make sure all that's melting is bring channelled away from their house.

Today when I got home from work it was a delicious 12° and I quickly rolled up my jeans and threw on some boots. It's a muddy season and the accumulated snow and ice pools on top of the still frozen ground. All across the neighbourhood was the sound of water being shovelled and ice being chopped. It's a necessary business this time of year - divert that stream downhill and into the sewers.

I've always been drawn to playing in the water; building dams or creating channels has occupied many happy hours of my time. Today was no different. And because it was a day of beauty, I made sure to pay attention to the curls of silt swirling under gravity's spell. Inspired by my findings, I went in search of more and found lilies and columbine bravely looking towards the sun.

A trip to the front yard revealed a fallen branch showing signs of being a bunny's breakfast. And outside my bedroom window laid a carpet of pine cone detritus left behind by my dog's nemesis, the red squirrel.

A day that began with a sunrise so stunning that it was discussed on the morning radio ended with an equally magnificent sunset. Its golden light reflecting off the glass in my living room.

I'm excited for spring; I hate having muddy dogs but I am enthralled by the greening of grey palette.

Before I leave you with photos from my beautiful day, I want to acknowledge my absence and plan on spending some time this weekend writing about my trip back to Minneapolis.